Incase any of you annoying humans were wondering, and it really is none of your business at the moment, ZIM has been…very…BUSY…forming the perfect plan for obliterating the human race! Yeah.
Approximately 4.5 hours ago, I sent a transmission to the Tallest. OH, were they pleased! But then again, why wouldn’t they be? Apparently, they had become so impressed with the progress of my mission, they decided to send me the most recent model of a Death Wave Cannon!
Ah…The memories of the infamous Battle of Del Snorg! It wasn’t too long ago—about seventy years before I came to Earth. War had broken out on Boodie Nen, so the Large Nostril people began to request for deadly war arsenal from Vort. Of course, our race had been on friendly terms with the Vortians at the time, so it wasn’t a problem for them to be exporting any weapons to their planet.
After a few months, things began to go weary. Vortians were making more weapons for Boodie Nen than for the Irkens. The Tallest became concerned, and offered the Vortians more monies for their work; the plan worked for a while, and the Vortians began to stop making their weapons. But soon afterwards, the Large Nostril people’s demand for weapons became overwhelming, and the Tallest knew there was a serious problem. Eventually, Vortian scientists and battle weaponry designers were spending more time working for Boodie Nen, sending arsenal to Boodie Nen, and get more monies from Boodie Nen.
Nyathead Fen was admiral of one of the armies on Boodie Nen. Their war was supposedly against rebelling forces on their planet--and Nyathead Fen took no mercy on rebels.Our Tallest had decided it was best to ban any Vortians working for the Irken Empire to have any interaction with Boodie Nen’s war. Unfortunately, the Vortians decided this was unfair, and that Irkens didn’t have the authority to stop them from working for anyone else.
A few months later, an Irken fleet blockaded the majority of Boodie Nen’s ports. The Large Nostril people decided to try and attack a few Irken ships—in the valley of Del Snorg. More Irken military ships were sent in, and battled with the Vortian-made Boodie Nen ships. A weapon that had been developed by highly advanced Vortian scientists years before was brought to the battle field—the Death Wave Cannon. It killed millions of the Large Nostril people, and all ongoing wars on the planet were immediately put to an end.
Then, began a golden age! Our race, which is the best race there could ever be, had entered the era where it could prove to be dominion over the whole universe! We left Boodie Nen at the time, and focused our concern on the Vortians. They had become enraged at what had happed at Del Snorg, and began to rally against the Irken Race. More of the Vortians began to hate the Irkens after we’d begun to invade more planets. Operation Impending Doom I was being formed, and their race grew more and more hatred towards us. So what was the best thing to do?
Imprisonment! We hadn’t begun to take complete control of their planet until near a half a century later, but most of the Vortians at that time were either taken as prisoners (and kept to design for the military), or persecuted…
BUT ENOUGH OF MY REMINESCENSE! The Tallest have agreed on sending me the Death Wave Cannon tomorrow! What seems sort of WEIRD about the whole ordeal was that when using a Death Wave Cannon, it’s usually manned by several people…If I were to use it while still on Earth, I, myself, ZIM, would be obliterated along with the humans! The Tallest said this certain model wouldn’t allow that to happen, so all is well!
Invader ZIM, signing off!